Out of the Ashes

Today, I suspect will be a little bit easier for me and my family.  I suspect that each day after will become easier too.  Yesterday was hard.  It was a day filled with crying, hugs, lots of phone calls and visits and the first steps in healing.  In the afternoon, we were even able to retreat to take naps from the exhaustion of being up all night.

I would like to say that no good ever comes from a devastating fire like this but we have been overwhelmed at the kindness of others and their geniune concern for our family.  I, myself, am in wonder of how my youngin’s are handling this.  Each one has a distinctly different approach to their healing process. My seven year old, spent the day crying and sobbing at different times. My baby girl had her own way of dealing with this by hugging and giving kisses all day long.  She fell asleep between her father and me last night, just so she knew that her we were right there next to her.  My oldest son is very, very sad and mopey. He broke down crying twice but immediately had to get himself under control because he is the oldest and takes his title very seriously. My second son has seemed to shut down and I worry about him the most.  He will not talk about it like the others and seems to pretend that everything will go away. I have not seen him cry at all.

My cousin has offered to take all of them trout fishing today which will be the best thing for them. To get them off the  farm and forget about it for awhile.

My husband, Tom (I will use his name at a time like this, it does not seem right to call him “Cranky” when he has been an amazing support pillar for the entire family.) and I are going to try to grind feed today and maybe catch up on some other farm chores. After all, the other animals still need to eat and life must go on. First, we have to figure out how to get electric to the augers as all of our internal farm power lines are down (on the ground).  These are the lines that the electric company does not service as they are own private lines from barn to barn. We could have used our generators if we had the skid loader to move them around. It’s all a catch 22 for awhile!

We also have to dispose of the dead goat carnage before the youngin’s get back from fishing.  It will much easier for them not to have to look at that anymore.  Although, they have all informed me that they will remember that site for the rest of their lives. I do not think I will ever be able to get it out of my head either. It is a mental site that we will always re visit.

Here are the remains of the barn.

The charred skid steer and skeleton remains of the rafters of the lean to addition.

Here is my daughter in front of what used to be swinging barn doors.

You will never guess what we found hiding under a bush yesterday.  This little guy who the youngin’s have named, “Lucky.”  Out of the ashes came the weak sound of a scared, lonely goat. He is the only goat to survive the fire and we have no idea how.  He is a registered Nubian buck so I guess that is what we will start our herd with when the time comes. He did not have a name in the three weeks since he was born because the kiddos knew they would have to sell him.  He seems to know his name already and I suppose he is not leaving this farm for awhile.  He will not leave the youngin’s out of his sight and spent the day in the house.  At supper last night, he slept under the table while we ate. His hair is singed, has some cuts, and his one foot is burned but overall he is in pretty good shape.  I do not have any goat’s milk for him but he sucked the cow milk right down.  Thank God, I did not lose my milk cows.

We also found four rabbits, two of which of are singed and burned but are eating and hopping around so I have hopes that they will be okay to. 

This little guy, “Lucky” gives us hope and makes it just a little easier to keep going.



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11 responses to “Out of the Ashes

  1. Pingback: Topics about Animals » Archive » Out of the Ashes

  2. You “sound” better today, although I know it must be painful. Finding the survivors will help you all heal, especially the kids – giving them hope when there is an almost no hope.

    Farmers are a tough lot – and your kids sound like troopers!

    Is the skidsteer salvageable? Or is it too cooked…

  3. That’s amazing that you had some animals survive. I’m sure they’ll help the kids get through this.

  4. Deere Driver

    Oh! I’m just catching up! I’m reading to my husband. I’m so sad for you. Love to all!

  5. Judi – I’m just catching up on my blogging and saw your post on the fire. I’m so very sorry about it all. No words can even begin to ease the sadness you all must be feeling. Lucky and the surviving rabbits will help the children to focus on something out of this tragedy. If there’s anything any of us “bloggy” friends can do to help just let us know. -Sandy

  6. I too am just catching up. I am so sorry, that’s all I know to say.

  7. Pam

    I am so glad you all have Lucky. That is so wonderful for the kids. Do you have any idea what started the fire? I keep thinking of the Amish and how they all come to the aid of the family that needs them(especially like building a barn). I am sure some of your farm friends are doing what they can. I don’t have an extra skid (Hmmm…I don’t have any skid) or I would send it your way. Keep loving on each other and trying to get the kids to talk about their feelings. (((hugs)) and prayers! Grammy

  8. Lucky or Phoenix? Hopefully the skidsteer can be reworked. Still keeping ya’ll in our thoughts and prayers.


  9. Deere Driver

    Agreed Pam!

    Have everyone tell the story over and over, to anyone, in their own way. It makes it important, and getting through it becomes more heroic then sad.

    Talking about it, even the ugly part, will become their – and your – strength to get beyond it.

    I’m telling your story and it makes us all appreciate our luck and what strength you need to move forward especially with the kids.

    Hugs and Best Wishes!!!!!!!

  10. I am so sorry about your barns and animals. I know you and your family feel like you have lost family members. When my husband gets back on the road (truckdriver) would love to send you one of our Nubian doelings to go with Lucky to start your new herd.

  11. So sorry to hear about your barn burning. I can’t even imagine the loss you are feeling.

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